Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Dear VH1,

I would like to have my own reality dating show, please.
I know you have millions of show ideas, including a show for Meghan and a show for Daisy, (both from Rock of Love), and countless other spinoffs, but please, hear me out.
I do not do anything special. I am in a band, but we're not famous. I have, however, had my struggles with getting the ladies. Apparently, I'm too normal or not exciting enough. 
That's how we sell it.
"Love to the Max" will be entertaining for the whole family! Seeing how I'm somewhat saving myself for marriage, and how you can't let anyone under 21 drink on national television, my show will be family friendly!
We need more regular, everyday guys on television. It's not fair that we get no love. Sorry we can not be washed up 80's hair metal frontmen, or old, wrinkly political hip hop hype men. God just hasn't blessed us with those unique talents. I'm hoping that God will bless me with this show.
Everyday, average, normal guys need love, too.
I would like for the pilot to be shot with 16 lucky girls. To make for good tv, please include some skanky hoes, or as I will say on the show, "Hoodrats". With the help of my bff Jackie, I will help filter out all the hoodrats untill I'm with a girl who I can hopefully never call again, this way ensuring me that I will have a second season.
I have some challenges already thought up, like the girls have to get gas in my car, then pick up my sister and her rowdy friends, drop them off, and the fastest time in returning to the house gets to spend a date with me.
Another one would be: Who can iron my clothes, make me a sandwich, and clean the kitchen in the fastest time.
And for our dates, we can go walk around or play videogames... however they want to spend quality time with me.
Seeing how I'm picky, and I like my girls to be very well kept, their tokens of my affection will be credit cards. I'll hand out the credit cards during the elimination. If they get to stay, my catch phrase will be something cheesy like "Does your love have a price?", and if they have to leave, "Your love has been Maxed out", where I then cut the card in half with ridiculously oversized scissors. 
So, please, I hope you put some serious thought and consideration into this letter.
I'm excited into hearing from you soon!

Love, 
Max.

5 comments:

  1. you are a riot and so full of yourself, i love it :)

    (keep writing, dear one. you have a voice and it is one, although i hear it quite often along with your drumset, that i am willing to listen to online as well :)

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  2. Max, I jumped here from Penni's blog...and I love your idea! After all, if they can have Wife Swap, Super Nanny, etc., your idea has a shot -- probably on a cable channel that is family-friendly, as you mentioned. Look forward to stopping back to read more...

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  3. Hilarious Max. Your Mom sent me. Is that a good start to a blog for someone your age or what? "My Mom sent them". I'm glad she did. As a person who occasionaly indulges in the shameful, guilty pleasure of "Rock of Love", I would probably watch your show.

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  4. "With the help of my bff Jackie, I will help filter out all the hoodrats untill I'm with a girl who I can hopefully never call again, this way ensuring me that I will have a second season."

    ahahahahaha. this is classic.

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  5. Great job Max. Welcome to the world of the blog. :)
    MMM

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